Auditioning for Theater…for Dummies
I just sat in day one of auditions for the latest show that I’m working on and after 9 hours, 37 actors, 72 monologues and 4 crazy people, I have developed my own list of what actors should know about auditioning for theater.
Now listen. I am no casting director. My experience in theater probably pails in comparison to others. And depending on the type of theater and type of company, these rules may not apply. But for a two act play where you have to pick a side* and prepare a contemporary monologue, these are my reflections after being in that room for 9 hours. They are in no particular order. Perhaps the order is just in the atrocious way I saw people violate them.
1. When auditioning, do yourself a favor and don’t age yourself inappropriately.
This is mainly a problem for women. Even if the part is age specific, say 25, 40 or 55…do yourself a favor and say no to 75% of the makeup that you are going to put on. You are doing yourself a disservice. A better bet would be to come neutrally and show a blank canvas. This way the director can see your potential and versatility.
2. In that same light, dress appropriately.
Sure you never really know what they are looking for. But don’t come dressed like a slut. Make sure your bra strapped isn’t showing. Don’t wear your ripped jeans. Stop trying so hard. The director and whoever else is in the room can read that. Don’t come dressed like you just got out of yoga or that you are about to start a job in corporate america. Find a neutral attire. Neutral attire and neutral face.
3. Pick better monologues.
Listen, there are a billion plays in the world. Stop picking crazy shit. Stop picking traditional crap. And find something interesting, engaging and something that will make you seem like a brilliant actor. Where are you guys getting these monologues? I mean seriously. And if you are going to pick a powerful monologue, you had better bring the power. You can not half ass something that is supposed to be powerful, tragic, comedic or whatever else. Bring all that you have! And please for god’s sake, don’t do a ten minute monologue. Chances are if the director hasn’t stopped you, its not because you are fabulous and he wants to hear it all. He probably zoned out and is thinking about washing his hair or something.
4. Come prepared.
Read the email that they send you about the audition. Pay attention to everything that they say. If they tell you to prepare a 2 minute monologue, that means they want you to prepare a two minute monologue. So don’t act shocked when they ask you, “What have you prepared for us today?” If they say, “Print out this form, fill it out and bring it to the audition.” That means exactly as it reads. It’s not complicated at all. If you don’t have a printer, go to the library, go to Kinko’s, go to your friend’s house and print that sucker out because it matters. Trust me.
5. Work on your physicality and stop fidgeting.
Be intentional about your movement. Know that using your hands to talk doesn’t make you a better actor. It doesn’t make the monologue more engaging. But if you are intentional and you are specific that will be more powerful that just flinging your limps and walking this way and that way every other line. If nothing else, stand still. It’s hard to hear your words over the tapping of your boots and heels!
6. Please note that there is a fine line between taking a risk and being bold and doing something so crazy but it works VERSUS just freaking people the hell out.
I don’t know where that line is, but there is a line. And some of you do things that scare us.
7. The audition starts the moment you walk in the door.
I’m not saying act the character from that moment. But if you need to take off your shoes and your necklace and your jacket and find your script in your folder that’s in the bottom of your bookbag…do that crap before you walk into the room. You should be ready to start the moment the door opens.
8. Keep your vices out of your head shot.
Listen, I love tattoos. I have 14. But at first glance of me, you wouldn’t know that I had a single one. And if you are doing a head shot, don’t pose in a way that i see the tattoo on your upper arm. Don’t take a head shot with some big fake diamond stud in your ear. Speaking of head shots, if its 30 years old, its 30 years old and you need to take a new one. Sure you look young and fresh and 15 in it but the moment you walk in the door we will know its 30 years later. So be honest and have a recent picture. But back to the vices. Show what you look like neutrally so that they are not distracted by the vices. Yes we can work around it and cover it up, but why don’t you do us the favor and show us that in your head shots.
9. If you are cut off mid monologue, don’t freak out.
Sometimes they cut you off because you suck. Yes that’s true. And sometimes they cut you off because you had them at hello and they know they have found what they are looking for. One lady was so fabulous in her monologue after three sentences the director said, “Damn!” Like the good damn when its just so good you smack your lips. So know that. Some times being cut off means you are just that great.
10. If the director or whomever gives you a direction or something to try and you don’t fully understand it, seek clarification and ask questions.
There is nothing wrong with asking questions. Sometimes directors say things that don’t make sense, so its ok. But if you pretend like you understand what they are saying and you don’t and then you go on to act this new “direction” and you completely miss the mark, they won’t think that maybe you misunderstood them. They are going to think that you cannot take directions. And that’s a bad thing.
So these are just 10 tips that I developed over the nine hours of auditions today. They don’t apply to everything. The opposite of it could be true. But its what I observed and heard the team talking about as each actor left the room. I wish there were a class called, “How to Audition. Never mind the monologue.”
*side: a small portion or the entirety of a scene from the play for the character you are auditioning for.
*”For Dummies” is no insult. I own several of the “For Dummies” book on a wide range of topics. They are just quick go to guides.
What would you add to this list? What do you think is ridiculous?
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