10 Things I Learned at the Pole Party – Pt 1

A few weeks ago I received an invitation to a Pole Dancing Party put on by one of my S Factor sisters, The Goddess Bernadette. We met and quickly bonded during my two week S Factor Immersion experience back in October that I have yet to write about. I realize that I had such a pleasurable time full of many memories at Bernadette’s pole party that I will have to break up the retelling of my adventure in numerous posts; which will include some pictures AND video considering I was the photographer of the night.

Today’s post regarding the Sexy Pole Party is a list of the 10 Things I Learned at the Pole Party.


1. Dancing for your significant other is courageous and sexy. But dancing for your significant other with 15 women sitting in the peanut gallery cheering you on and screaming in support of you takes it from sexy to RED HOT FIRE GOD DAMN!!!! But then again, one should also note that dancing for your significant other for the first time while 15+ women cheer you on is even crazier and absolutely amazing considering that the woman who did it was four months pregnant WITH TWINS at the time and it was her first time ever dancing for her significant other.

2. Taking pictures in low candle lighting with women dancing freestyle is a challenge but its great when you capture those moments.

3. Giving a lap dance to one person is good. Giving a lap dance to two people in two separate chairs is great. Taking the full song to play with the energy of dancing for and to, two different people in two different places at the same time is awesome. My favorite moment is the slow sultry walk I did to one person where my whole body was pushing towards them while the entire time my gaze ate the second person up. My eyes never left theirs. OH my, it was awesome.

4. Apparently, while I can’t do an isolated booty clap twitch, it turns out I can do a reverse booty clap.

5. One of my Siren’s nicknames was coined that night. “C4”. Apparently “firecracker”, “dynamite” and “tnt” just weren’t good enough. When trying to describe me, one women eventually landed on “C4”. Fitting.

6. Pole parties are awesome.

7. You can be sensual and sexy in anything. One lady had a tiny skirt on, another danced in thigh highs and yet another danced in an apron. It doesn’t matter. It’s about you. Everything else is simply an accent and anything can be an accent. I used the rag we used to wipe the pole down in my dance in multiple ways.

8. New Jersey isn’t that scary after all. Actually they have a lot more space and maybe I’m the crazy one for paying twice the amount in rent for half the space just to live in Brooklyn.

9. It takes bravery, courage, power and a beautiful soul to lift your feet off the ground and let gravity guide you in a circular spin in front of a group of women, many of which you may have never met before. So while, some women at the party are experienced pole students and dancers, there were many who touched the pole for the first time and I believe they were so powerful to not only touch it but to let go and let their body twirl.

10. Women NEED more spaces, places, events, situations and communities that allow for openness, vulnerability, fun and acceptance. I am so grateful that my friend Bernadette opened up her home to us.

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